by Dave F.

This was my 4^th Ironman, so you’d think I would go into it with some degree of confidence. My experience was the opposite—I had a high degree of anxiety. My training got disrupted a lot over the summer, so I went into the race unsure if I had really done enough to get through it. By Saturday night, and even Sunday morning it was peaking and my stress levels were higher than they were for my first IM back in 2019. I even considered skipping out, but didn’t want to waste all the money.

The swim started rough, which didn’t help. I couldn’t find a rhythm early and struggled for the first 5-10 minutes. Eventually I settled in and actually had a really good time for me. That restored a little bit of confidence. T1 went smoothly and then I was off on the bike.

Part of what had concerned me ahead of time was all the hills. In my last IM, my chain actually snapped going up a hill, and caused a long delay. The hills loomed large in my mind going in…and they were as hard for me as I imagined. I felt good the first lap, but by the end of the second I could tell my legs were pretty shot. When I started the run I knew I was in trouble…not dangerous trouble, but the kind that knows that your original plans weren’t going to happen.

But I kept plowing forward…that’s all I really know how to do! I ran the downhills and flats, and walked the uphills. I’ve come to really dislike all hills! I spent most of the time doing math in my head; figuring out what pace I needed to keep in order to finish, trying out different scenarios, etc. Sometimes I was quite confident I would finish, other times I thought it would be close. But I was determined to do whatever I needed to do, so I kept going. At the turnaround near mile 21-22, a volunteer told me it was 10:08, and I knew at that point I would finish. Relief! Even if I walked the whole way in from there, I would make it.

And I did! I felt like I pressed through more challenges in this race than any of my others. A good number of those were mental, which I find are tougher to deal with in some ways than the physical ones. The spectator support made a big difference for me this year, more so than in previous years. Often that’s what kept me running when I wanted to walk.

Now I’m in recovery, and trying to process the fact that I have done four Ironman races. I can remember when one seemed an impossibility. To have done four is a little beyond belief. Not something I ever imagined…I don’t think that has really sunk in yet…but I plan to think about it a lot this week.